Post by Puppet Master on Aug 17, 2012 13:15:49 GMT -5
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during Xibalba’s set last night in Vancouver BC, I was standing in front of what looked like a desk. two other people were standing upon said desk, one of which was my partner, the other person was unfamiliar to me and I assume he was a part of or supporting a band, (i have done some further research since writing this and he has been ID’d as Louise of Alpha and Omega.) During the first three quarters of Xibalba’s set everything was fine and everyone, including myself we’re enjoying themselves and carrying on as one usually would during a hardcore show. During one of the last songs of the set one of the guitar players leaned up against me, I backed away a bit in order to give him space and to not muddle the sound of his guitar. Soon after, I felt two hands firmly gripping both of my shoulders. For some seconds I thought it was fine as I assumed it was just my partner. However a few seconds later I felt intervals of pressure on the back of my head. I turned around in order to confirm what was going on as that kind of behavior is uncharacteristic of my partner. It was then that I noticed that Louise was continuously thrusting his pelvis into the back of my head. Being in an environment where the ability to exchange dialogue is compromised and having been made extremely uncomfortable by the actions of a complete stranger, I swung my fist at him three times and removed myself from the crowd to decompress. With intention to have a conversation afterward I sat at the bar area and waited until the band finished. A few minutes later I saw Louise and approached him to have a discourse about what had just happened and why I reacted the way that I did. He stated that it was a misunderstanding and that I over reacted. I felt it fair to try to explain myself for my initial reaction, however, instead of welcoming the exchange I was berated and talked down upon for my initial reaction as well as being upset about what had just taken place, and for trying to talk further about what had just happened. After attempting to explain myself several times only to end up getting cut off and and yelled at, our exchange ended with him telling me to go fuck myself. It was then that my partner approached him in order to have further discourse about both of the negative interactions that had just taken place. I can’t say anything about their exchange as I wasn’t within earshot but it seemed like a lot of the package had become involved. My partner and I had left shortly after. On the way out, being visibly upset I was approached by one of my friends asking what the matter was. I told her I didn’t want to talk about it and thats when my partner, myself and a different friend, (from out of town,) left.
I never expected NOT to be pushed or bumped into at shows. There were familiar people there who I was interacting with on a physical level, (dancing, hugging, etc.) I understand that a lot of people are more then happy to tolerate the behavior of strangers while at live music events and I would like to think that I am not excluded from the mix. However, when someone you don’t know is standing on a table and grabs your shoulders from behind I think thats a little bit different. If that person were to put pressure on the back of your head what would your initial reaction be? If the pressure was coming from someone’s crotch how would that make you feel?
I know people have already solidified opinions around this issue and I don’t expect publishing this will change anyone’s mind. However, I feel like it’s good to have both accounts of this incident public. There is always going to be conflicting information when something like this hits social media, and people have a tendency to form opinions before asking questions which is to be expected.
I want to publicly apologize for taking this long to write and publish this statement.
during Xibalba’s set last night in Vancouver BC, I was standing in front of what looked like a desk. two other people were standing upon said desk, one of which was my partner, the other person was unfamiliar to me and I assume he was a part of or supporting a band, (i have done some further research since writing this and he has been ID’d as Louise of Alpha and Omega.) During the first three quarters of Xibalba’s set everything was fine and everyone, including myself we’re enjoying themselves and carrying on as one usually would during a hardcore show. During one of the last songs of the set one of the guitar players leaned up against me, I backed away a bit in order to give him space and to not muddle the sound of his guitar. Soon after, I felt two hands firmly gripping both of my shoulders. For some seconds I thought it was fine as I assumed it was just my partner. However a few seconds later I felt intervals of pressure on the back of my head. I turned around in order to confirm what was going on as that kind of behavior is uncharacteristic of my partner. It was then that I noticed that Louise was continuously thrusting his pelvis into the back of my head. Being in an environment where the ability to exchange dialogue is compromised and having been made extremely uncomfortable by the actions of a complete stranger, I swung my fist at him three times and removed myself from the crowd to decompress. With intention to have a conversation afterward I sat at the bar area and waited until the band finished. A few minutes later I saw Louise and approached him to have a discourse about what had just happened and why I reacted the way that I did. He stated that it was a misunderstanding and that I over reacted. I felt it fair to try to explain myself for my initial reaction, however, instead of welcoming the exchange I was berated and talked down upon for my initial reaction as well as being upset about what had just taken place, and for trying to talk further about what had just happened. After attempting to explain myself several times only to end up getting cut off and and yelled at, our exchange ended with him telling me to go fuck myself. It was then that my partner approached him in order to have further discourse about both of the negative interactions that had just taken place. I can’t say anything about their exchange as I wasn’t within earshot but it seemed like a lot of the package had become involved. My partner and I had left shortly after. On the way out, being visibly upset I was approached by one of my friends asking what the matter was. I told her I didn’t want to talk about it and thats when my partner, myself and a different friend, (from out of town,) left.
I never expected NOT to be pushed or bumped into at shows. There were familiar people there who I was interacting with on a physical level, (dancing, hugging, etc.) I understand that a lot of people are more then happy to tolerate the behavior of strangers while at live music events and I would like to think that I am not excluded from the mix. However, when someone you don’t know is standing on a table and grabs your shoulders from behind I think thats a little bit different. If that person were to put pressure on the back of your head what would your initial reaction be? If the pressure was coming from someone’s crotch how would that make you feel?
I know people have already solidified opinions around this issue and I don’t expect publishing this will change anyone’s mind. However, I feel like it’s good to have both accounts of this incident public. There is always going to be conflicting information when something like this hits social media, and people have a tendency to form opinions before asking questions which is to be expected.
I want to publicly apologize for taking this long to write and publish this statement.
